Monday, October 31, 2011

Avoiding Contention and Seeking Godliness

I was asked to present a talk for this past Sunday during sacrament meeting. The second part of this talk is one of my most favorite topics, and frankly, I love talking about the gospel, so giving talks is totally my thing.


We have been instructed to “shun contention. Seek godliness. Be enlightened by eternal truth. Be like-minded with the Lord in love and united with Him in faith. Then shall “the peace of God, which passeth all understanding” (Philip. 4:7), be yours, to bless you and your posterity through generations yet to come.

Contention rips relationships apart often. It can stem from many incidences. Our job is to avoid contention and to seek godliness.

A friend of mine told me this: when she has a problem with someone, and her dislike for this particular individual is strong, she makes peace rather than allows the tangible tension between her and the other person take over. She will find something positive about that person, that she believes is true, and tell said person that certain positive thing. For example; “I really liked that skirt you wore to church on Sunday.”

The product? Most times you will find that said person will reply with a positive also.

This isn’t a quick fix by any means. You are likely to dislike this person until they prove themselves to not be annoying. But until they do, the best way to avoid unnecessary contention is to find a way of calming the storm.

Swallow your pride. It’s better to lose an argument rather than let it consume and fester to the point of poisoning your soul.

Contention is a choice.

Often time contention stems from our own inner turmoil. I have observed that in my life, and in the life of those I know, that when we sin there is desire to cause contention. I met a young man who is now my friend because of his want to cause contention with me, a random person he did not know. He was surfing our mutual friend’s myspace (back in the day when that was the thing) and he clicked on my name. He saw that I was a Mormon, and decided he would start a fight. He is an inactive member and has had a rough past, which included sin that has made him bitter. During this period in his life he was having a hard time with forgiveness. He asked me what I—as a Mormon—believed about forgiveness.

When I’m asked about the church, and I have the time and ability to do my research, my answer is a talk longer than I’m allowed to give now.

My reply surprised him. Instead of responding defensively as he expected, I gave him truth with a genuine desire to help him. In later discussions he told me that he was taken aback, and instead of going on to try and pursue a course of discord, he decided I was an individual worth getting to know. Now we are friends. He is still inactive, and I’m still solid in my beliefs, but because I decided against allowing contention, I gained a new friend who is less negative toward the church because of our encounter.

The moral of this story is not only to respond with a heart of peace versus one of anger, but to repent. If you are suffering a burden of sin, fix it. Sin cannot exist in peace. If you are buckling under the weight of something you have done wrong, or something you believe you did wrong, if something is haunting your heart and mind, go to the bishop. Even if you are burdened by events that turned you into a victim; I promise that if you go to your bishop and repent, or speak to him about the things that have happened to you, he can help you relieve yourself of that weight. I know that this weight is painful and heavy. And I know that the relief you feel when you finally remove that heartache from yourself literally changes who you are as a person. You will become better, you will have more joy; and your desire to cause pain in your life and in the life of others will disappear.

The closer you are to the Savior, and the harder you work to live the commandments, the heavier sin becomes, and the quicker you recognize when you have to fix a problem. It is better to be hit in the head with guilt and to repent quickly, than to not recognize sin immediately, and then end up in a hole you can’t crawl out of by yourself. Be sensitive to your choices. Do the basic things you know you need to do in order to bring yourself closer to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. They want you to succeed. They want you to come home.

In 2 Timothy 2: 3 we are told to “endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.” Maybe I’m a bit of a nerd, and am the only one that thinks this is cool. But the idea of being a soldier for Christ, to be a warrior for the gospel and of God—is kind of epic to me. We are in the midst of a war. The armor of God is our defense, and if we let it loose a little we may fail.

I think Tolkien put it best when he wrote the Lord of the Rings, which is loosely based on the book of Revelations. He took the enemy and put them into physical forms of ugliness that the heroes had to fight. It is the same for us, the difference is is that our swords are our testimony, and the Orc, Uruk-hai etc is sin, and every contention and every weapon and evil device of the devil.

So Orcs started out as Elves. It’s the same with us. We can remain pure, or fall and become nasty monsters that eat man-flesh.

Versus 11-13, and 16-17 in 2 Timothy 2 says:

11 It is a faithful saying: For if we be adead with him, we shall also live with him:
12 If we asuffer, we shall also breign with him: if we cdeny him, he also will deny us:
13 If we abelieve not, yet he abideth faithful: he cannot bdenyhimself.
16 But shun profane and avain babblings: for they will increase unto more bungodliness.
17 And their aword will eat as doth a canker

Seek after Godliness! How do I say that to get your attention, to help you understand the importance of this call? Contention is not of God. Avoid it, and if it has become a part of your life, purge yourself from it and repent.

We are sons and daughters of God who are destined for eternal greatness. We are to become Gods and Goddesses. Why should we settle for anything less when we can help it? Serve, love, teach. Have compassion. Be more concerned for the cares of others. Fight for a testimony. It is so important to regain one, for you had one before you came to this earth. Otherwise you wouldn’t be here.
If I didn’t have a testimony I would have given up a long time ago. We cannot afford to be wasteful with our choices. If you need help ask for it.

Matthew 7:12 Say unto them, Ask of God; ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.

Godliness is not simply going to be handed to you. First you must have a desire for it, and then you have to work for it. It’s not an easy task. But nothing worth having comes easy.

Elder Marvin J. Ashton in his talk No time for Contention stated: “we have no time for contention. We only have time to be about our Father’s business. Contend with no man. Conduct yourselves as gentlemen with calmness and conviction and I promise you success.”

If we are too busy being miserable with contention, our time is wasted and we can get nothing worth our divine nature done. You are regal spirits of a noble lineage. Act that way! Your spirit knows who you are, the mortal must catch up. Be a peacemaker, avoid contention. Seek after godliness. It was what you were made for.

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ Amen.

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